Andy Rooney, going out the way he came in:

This is a moment I have dreaded. I wish I could do this forever. I can’t though. But I’m not retiring. Writers don’t retire and I’ll always be a writer. A lot of you have sent me wonderful letters and said good things to me when you meet me in the street. I wasn’t always gracious about it. It’s hard to accept being liked. I don’t say this often, but thank you. Although if you do see me in a restaurant, please, just let me eat my dinner.

He is an idol to grumpy old men everywhere. And, believe me, I know. I have, in the course of a checkered career that has never warranted it, been asked for an autograph now and again. My instinct, never followed thank the gods, is always to whack the person up side the head and run for the exit.

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